1. Behave like a female, i.e. all the tenderness of a
female–a man doesn’t want a man for his wife.
female–a man doesn’t want a man for his wife.
2. Dress pleasantly/attractively. If you are a
home-maker,don’t stay in your sleeping suit all day.
home-maker,don’t stay in your sleeping suit all day.
3. Smell good!
4. Don’t lay out all your problems on your husband as
soon as he walks in. Give him a little mental break.
soon as he walks in. Give him a little mental break.
5. Don’t keep asking him, “what are you thinking?”
6. Stop nagging non-stop before Allah ta’ala gives
you something really to complain about.
you something really to complain about.
7. Absolutely no talking about your spousal problems
to anyone you meet, not even under the pretense
of seeking help! If you think you want to solve
legitimate marital issues, then go seek counseling
with the right person who can give advice in either:
to anyone you meet, not even under the pretense
of seeking help! If you think you want to solve
legitimate marital issues, then go seek counseling
with the right person who can give advice in either:
+ Mediate any injustice done so any wrong can be
corrected and the couple can reunite in harmony, or
corrected and the couple can reunite in harmony, or
+ Amicable divorce
8. Be kind to your mother-in-law the same way you
would like your husband to be kind to your own
mother.
would like your husband to be kind to your own
mother.
9. Learn all the rights and obligations of each other
in Islam. Focus on fulfilling your obligations, not
demanding your rights
in Islam. Focus on fulfilling your obligations, not
demanding your rights
10. Race to the door when he comes home, as if
you were waiting for him. Smile and hug him.
you were waiting for him. Smile and hug him.
11. Keep your house clean, at least to the level
that he wants it.
that he wants it.
12. Compliment him on the things you know he’s
not so confident about (looks, intelligence, etc.)
This will build his self-esteem.
not so confident about (looks, intelligence, etc.)
This will build his self-esteem.
13. Tell him he’s the best husband ever.
14. Call his family often.
15. Give him a simple task to do at home and then
thank him when he does it. This will encourage
him to do more.
thank him when he does it. This will encourage
him to do more.
16. When he’s talking about something boring,
listen and nod your head. Even ask questions
to make it seem like you’re interested.
listen and nod your head. Even ask questions
to make it seem like you’re interested.
17. Encourage him to do good deeds.
18. If he’s in a bad mood, give him some space.
He’ll get over it, inshaAllah.
He’ll get over it, inshaAllah.
19. Thank him sincerely for providing you with
food and shelter. It’s a big deal.
food and shelter. It’s a big deal.
20. If he’s angry with you and starts yelling, let him
yell it out while you’re quiet. You will see your
fight will end a lot faster. Then when he’s calm,
you can tell him your side of the story and how
you want him to change something.
yell it out while you’re quiet. You will see your
fight will end a lot faster. Then when he’s calm,
you can tell him your side of the story and how
you want him to change something.
21. When you’re mad at him, don’t say “YOU
make me furious”, rather, “This action makes
me upset”. Direct your anger to the action and
circumstance rather than at him.
make me furious”, rather, “This action makes
me upset”. Direct your anger to the action and
circumstance rather than at him.
22. Remember that your husband has feelings,
so take them into consideration.
so take them into consideration.
23. Let him chill with his friends without guilt,
especially if they’re good guys. Encourage
him to go out, so he doesn’t feel “cooped up”
at home.
especially if they’re good guys. Encourage
him to go out, so he doesn’t feel “cooped up”
at home.
24. If your husband is annoyed over a little thing
you do (and you can control it), then stop doing
it. Really.
you do (and you can control it), then stop doing
it. Really.
25. Learn how to tell him what you expect without
him having to guess all the time. Learn to
communicate your feelings.
him having to guess all the time. Learn to
communicate your feelings.
26. Don’t get mad over small things. It’s not worth it.
27. Make jokes. If you’re not naturally funny, go on
the internet and read some jokes, and then tell
them to him.
the internet and read some jokes, and then tell
them to him.
28. Tell him you’re the best wife ever and
compliment yourself on certain things you
know you’re good at.
compliment yourself on certain things you
know you’re good at.
29. Learn to make his favorite dish.
30. Don’t ever, EVER talk bad about him with
friends or family unnecessarily. If they end up
agreeing with you, you will see that it hits you
back in the face because you get more depressed
that you have a bad husband–and other people
also think you have a bad husband.
friends or family unnecessarily. If they end up
agreeing with you, you will see that it hits you
back in the face because you get more depressed
that you have a bad husband–and other people
also think you have a bad husband.
31. Use your time wisely and get things accomplished.
If you’re a home-maker, take online classes
and get active in your community. This will
make you happy and a secondary bonus is
that it impresses your husband.
If you’re a home-maker, take online classes
and get active in your community. This will
make you happy and a secondary bonus is
that it impresses your husband.
32. Do all of the above fee sabeelillah and you
will see Allah put barakah in everything you do.
will see Allah put barakah in everything you do.
33. Husband and wife should discuss and
communicate with wisdom with each other to
convey what they like and dislike of each other
to do or not to do. Do NOT give commands or
instructions like he’s your servant. “They are
garment to each other” [Surah Baqarah, 2:187]
communicate with wisdom with each other to
convey what they like and dislike of each other
to do or not to do. Do NOT give commands or
instructions like he’s your servant. “They are
garment to each other” [Surah Baqarah, 2:187]
34. Tell your husband you love him, many, many
times. Aisha (رضالله عنها) narrated that the Prophet
used to ask her how strong her love for him, she
said like “a knot.” And the next time he would ask
her, “How is that knot?” He also used to reply to
her saying, “Jazzakillah, O Aishah, wallahi, you
have not rejoiced in me as I have rejoiced in you.”
times. Aisha (رضالله عنها) narrated that the Prophet
used to ask her how strong her love for him, she
said like “a knot.” And the next time he would ask
her, “How is that knot?” He also used to reply to
her saying, “Jazzakillah, O Aishah, wallahi, you
have not rejoiced in me as I have rejoiced in you.”
35. Have a race with your husband and let him
win, even if you are much fitter and stronger than him.
win, even if you are much fitter and stronger than him.
36. Keep fit and take care of your health so you will
remain a strong mother, wife, cook and housekeeper,
inshaAllah you will not get FAT and frumpy.
remain a strong mother, wife, cook and housekeeper,
inshaAllah you will not get FAT and frumpy.
37. Refine and cultivate good mannerisms i.e do
not whine, don’t laugh or talk too loud or walk
like an elephant.
not whine, don’t laugh or talk too loud or walk
like an elephant.
38. Do not leave the house without his permission
and certainly not without his knowledge.
and certainly not without his knowledge.
39. Make sure all his clothes are clean and
pressed so he is always looking fresh and crisp.
pressed so he is always looking fresh and crisp.
40. Don’t discuss important/controversial matters
with him when he is tired or sleepy. Find right
time for right discussion.
with him when he is tired or sleepy. Find right
time for right discussion.
41. The way to a man’s heart is through his stomach.
42. Always let him know that you appreciate him
working and bringing home the “dough”. It makes
it easier for him to go to work.
working and bringing home the “dough”. It makes
it easier for him to go to work.
43. Make sure you ALWAYS have something for dinner.
44. Brush your hair, everyday.
45. Don’t forget to do laundry.
46. Surprise him with gifts. Even necessities,
such as new shoes, can be gifts.
such as new shoes, can be gifts.
47. Listen to him. (Even when he talks about
extremely boring things like basketball or computers.)
extremely boring things like basketball or computers.)
48. Try (hard as it might be) to take interest in
his hobbies.
his hobbies.
49. Try not to go shopping too much … and spend
all his money.
all his money.
50. Look attractive and be seductive towards him.
Flirt with him.
Flirt with him.
51. Learn tricks and “techniques” to please your
husband in intimacy. (Of course goes both ways.)
husband in intimacy. (Of course goes both ways.)
52. Prepare for special evenings with him with special
dinner and exclusive time (no children permitted).
dinner and exclusive time (no children permitted).
53. Take care of your skin, especially your face.
The face is center of attraction.
The face is center of attraction.
54. If you not satisfied intimately, talk to him and
tell him.Help him or provide resources, don’t
wait until matters become worse.
tell him.Help him or provide resources, don’t
wait until matters become worse.
55. Ask Allah to strengthen and preserve the
bonds of compassion and love between the two
of you, every day, every prayer. Ask him to protect
that bond from Shaytaan. When a lesser devil
destroys the love between spouses, he is the
most beloved of Shaytaan. Nothing works like
du’ah, and love only exists between spouses
where Allah instills it.
bonds of compassion and love between the two
of you, every day, every prayer. Ask him to protect
that bond from Shaytaan. When a lesser devil
destroys the love between spouses, he is the
most beloved of Shaytaan. Nothing works like
du’ah, and love only exists between spouses
where Allah instills it.
56. Don’t EVER compare your husbands to
other husbands! For example don’t say, “well
her husband doesn’t do that, why do you …”
(thats a killer!)
other husbands! For example don’t say, “well
her husband doesn’t do that, why do you …”
(thats a killer!)
57. Be happy with what you have because no one
is perfect. If you want perfection, wait until you
enter Jannah together inshaAllah–and of course,
vice versa!
is perfect. If you want perfection, wait until you
enter Jannah together inshaAllah–and of course,
vice versa!
58. Strive for Allah’s love first and foremost! if all
wives try to seek Allah’s love and pleasure,
And remember–if Allah loves you, the angels
will love you, and the entire creation will love you.
wives try to seek Allah’s love and pleasure,
And remember–if Allah loves you, the angels
will love you, and the entire creation will love you.
59. If you pack a lunch for your husband to take
to work, from time to time sneak in a little love
note or sweet poem. If he doesn’t take a lunch
leave the note somewhere else for him to find,
like in his briefcase, or wallet or on the car
steering-wheel
to work, from time to time sneak in a little love
note or sweet poem. If he doesn’t take a lunch
leave the note somewhere else for him to find,
like in his briefcase, or wallet or on the car
steering-wheel
60. Wake him up for Qiyam ul-Layl (in the last third
of the night ) and ask him tO pray with yOu.
of the night ) and ask him tO pray with yOu.
( ^ ________________ ^ )
s.E.k.i.A.n
